geoff says - car boots cornwall
Why not SELL YOUR CAR at our Car Boot Sales?Posted: 24/05/2019
On Saturday 4th May at Mitchell a seller brought all his selling items in his 12-year-old Jaguar which he also wanted to sell. Now then, not only did he sell all of his displayed items he also sold his car and he paid the grandly sum of £8.00 to sell the lot taking home well over two grands. For him it was a well-planned and a good day’s work which lasted for less than two hours. Well done young man. We encourage all sellers who are wanting to sell vehicles to come to our boot sales with the vehicle you are hoping to sell loaded up with your selling items but make sure your car doesn’t stink of fag ash or stale farts in other words clean the inside and outside right! Now then, you should have at least two presentable adverts to stick either to your windscreens with a drawing pin or sellotape on the windows of the car you are now ready to sell, you will have to pay only £8.00 for the stall and the car and we wish you luck! Bit of dosh back of the car, know what I mean sport but be careful we often get the fuzz and Trading Standards on site, and they don’t come to sell nor buy mate! Oh, and by the way, we know someone who has been caught by the Inland Revenue for selling on eBay under various names but not declaring the incomes tut-tut.

Please note; if you sell a vehicle at any of our Car Boot Sales, we will accept no responsibility for any vehicles sold at our locations howsoever advertised whether the vehicle is either owned or stolen by you or it’s a wreck or whatever I don’t GAF cos the onus for the car is entirely on yourselves so don’t over exaggerate its condition and don’t ffs say “it’s got almost new tyres” when the whole world can see they are as bald as an old man’s wrinkly bum ffs! Cost is £8.00 for the selling car or a van is from £10.00 amen! One of the main advantages is that you don’t get potential tyre-kickers who have seen your advert in the paper and then they come around to your place with all the bleedn kids wasting time expecting to be invited in for a tea or a coffee, wot no biscuits and then they don’t buy the car ffs, another benefit is that the pigging neighbours don’t get to know all yer business do they though? FFS! Alternatively, you could go up-market and sell your car at the Lodge & Thomas Car Auctions held at the Truro Cattle Market on Thursdays at 6.00pm (check their website for further details) Lodge and Thomas have been our Landlords for the 30 years that we have held Car Boot Sales at Truro Cattle Market. They are without doubt the best Landlords ever over the 30 years and we have never had cross words cos they have allowed us to run our Car Boot Sales without interference and they have trusted us with the care of the Cattle Market during their absence.
Have you read the'weasel story'? If you know some red hot gossip tell me and I promise I will not identify you, for instance 'what's Marge up to these days'? X
Ample is beautiul and cudlesome and......X
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Posted on HOME PAGE 20/05/2019Posted: 22/05/2019
WE HAVE MOVED TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS at NEWQUAY Chapel Farm Car Boot Sales at 12.0 noon
WE HAVE MOVED Tuesday & Thursday Car Boot Sales at 12.00 noon to Chapel Farm almost opposite HENDRA HOLIDAY PARK first opinions are very favorable we have a nice clean location, enjoy!! SUNDAYS at TRURO & St Columb Major at 1.30 pm// Please Note; TRURO Cattle Market will change the start time from SUNDAY 2nd of JUNE to 12.00 noon for the rest of the year however on the 2nd of June you can present any FIVE tickets to gain £5.00 off selling for the one day only at 12.00 noon!! We are no longer involved with the running of PENRYN Rugby Club due to lack of support at this venue. Please be secure with your stalls and ensure no-one steals from you especially young children. Be well and enjoy your life. Geoff X
It's my daddy.........
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Major Gossip, you must read this;Posted: 22/05/2019

The Weasel!
A regular seller who sells mainly tools often arrives at our locations in particular Truro Cattle Market normally he is in a know-all grumpy sod of a rude mood, wherever I park him with his white knacked out clapped out old van he complains that I could have parked him in a better place (“it does not matter where tf you are parked if you have the bargains the buyers will find you believe me”) He’s never happy unless he’s miserable the cantankerous sod that he is so he is FFS. Anyway’s today I learned some major gossip about this man who is apparently known to other sellers and regular auction buyers as ‘the weasel’ ffs, I was reliably informed by my ‘in the know informant who should remain anonymous’ (Jim Slyps) that this is what happened;

The ‘Weasel’ was at the famous Martin Rowe Auctions one fine day in May where he was trying to make bids on various boxes of mixed stuffs including loads of tools and the like. The auctioneers totally ignored the Weasel’s efforts to bid preferring to take bids from the floor ignoring ‘the Weasel’ completely and totally blanking him out so to speak ffs! ‘Weasel’ was more than furious seething stamping his feet almost spitting blood ffs so he waited right to the bitter end of the auction complaining to all and sundry or those who could be bothered to listen bitterly that ‘he had bought nothing, nowt, frig all, pissing fcuk all, zilcho caput zero FFS!! So determined was ‘Weasel’ that he went to complain to the highest level of the Auction House land the Auctioneers Office no less! He was invited into the office and was asked to ‘look at the TV screen’ where they had been filming him since he arrived at the auction. They showed him parts of the film as he watched himself taking various items out of some of the boxes of lots and putting the ‘now stolen’ items into the boxes that he was intending to bid on the cheeky sod not just one box but more than several boxes ffs! That is a premeditated criminal act by intending to steal items from several boxes probably depriving items owned by someone entirely unrelated to the boxes that he wanted to bid on, tut-tut fs. I am also reliably informed that other buyers knew ‘the Weasel’ was doing this dishonest act for some time hopefully it was one of they who shopped him, brainless he was because;
“Now then, if I had been doing what he were a doing then suddenly the Auctioneer is totally blanking me I would have said to myself it must be my aftershave something’s wrong ere mate they’ve ignoring me fcuk me I reckon they must of frigging twigged me ffs (panic-stricken) help, ffs they king know what I am up to, games up mate, where is the quickest exit ffs let’s walk away quickly with tightly squezzed butt cheeks and in jerky movements so let’s FRO the now FFS! Then I would have gone home and changed my underwear made a cup of coffee, good god that was a close one, phew!! I jest!

It is quite obvious to those of us who have common-sense that all Auction Houses would have very good close-circuit systems recording their popular weekly sales. ‘The weasel’ was barred from Martin Rowe Auction house, he was very lucky they didn’t involve the Police! Result or what, r-soles like the weasel should be publicly shamed for their stupidity and dishonest activities with a smart kick in the balls as a quiet bit of justice, metaphorically speaking so to speak! We salute Martin Rowe Auctioneers who have always had a great reputation over the thirty odd years we have known them.

Result or what! I mean, how tf can any-one personage earn the nick-name of ‘the Weasel’ ffs! Oh, and by the way this man’s actions harms our good name and reputation at CBC cos all the auction people know that ‘the Weasel’ sells a most of the Car Boot Sales including Rosudgeon and Hayle!
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How much pay for a handbag made me ill fs.Posted: 10/05/2019
Updated 01/06/2019;
A few weeks Lou asked me to take her to the MULBERRY shop in Somerset cos her wanted to look at the hand-made handbags. We walked into the store which was full mainly of handbags and other MULBERRY stuff. I am pretty impatient, I have seen the handbags, now what, shall we go? but no, she the woman I have loved for over 30 years insists on drawing my attention to a brown leather handmade which she models with a huge smile on her face, decision made! I am lead to the cashier which was the first time I learned the price, I looked at Lou 'how dare you I was only wanting to pay up to a couple of hundred quids.I didn't dare wipe the smile of her face so kept my trap shut. I ask for a chair whilst I get over the cashiers demand for payment of £650 pounds FFS.

Delighted she was pissed off I was, the journey home with the new handbag made me think behave yourself Geoff and then I remembered this; Many years ago I bought Lou a gift that I paid £50 for, her was pleased, I was pleased. The next weekend at the Car Boot at Truro there on one sellers stall is the identical gift that I had bought for Lou and it was only £8.00 and brand new ffs! We made a vow from that day that we would not buy any presents for each other, no cards no birthdays no anniversaries no Christmas presents nowt!

I looked at her new handbag as she sits there admiring her very own Mulberry and thought it must be fifteen years since I have bought her a present and I have just treated her to a bag costing £650.00 ffs the first present like forever and then I worked out the cost over the fifteen year and fcuk me it works out at an average of £43.00 a year which is about 12 pence a day! What a 'bargain' and the smile of happiness beamed across her face or was it a touch of the the belches the dear of her. Isn't it a tad snobby to ave a bag that cost so much but I am thinking of changing my watch soon and it is not going to be cheap my darling Lou.

Our love has blossomed (until today) since the arrival of the bag which was shown to my lovely Dementia mother in law who took one look at the bag after Lou displayed it and walked out of the room without a word, but she did turn left instead of going right opening the cupboard door thinking it was her bedroom ffs! I live on the funny farm, by the way did you know we have got three Alpacas two goats 6 chickens two Chiwawas and the swallows have returned so life is beautiful all of the time, allegedly. I asked mother in law "What have you been doing all day" she says "Oh I have been milking the Alpacas and the goats" which is a blatant lie cos they are all castrated boys ffs the dear of her. I wouldn't mind but its all in her mind which is slowing up, such a shame Dementia nice people losing their dignity and their minds, be nice to the carers please. Geoff

Quick story;

My mate Kym dearly loves his wife and as a gift to her he quietly went about buying a car for she paying the stunning price of £1500.00 (wow big spender) anyway he arrived home with the car and her reaction was "Thank-you but I don't like the car, Kym was mostly pissed off ending up with saying 'well if you don't like it then sell ffs!' He didn't actually say ffs but it adds to the story! now then wifey back home sets about selling the car and son in law was asked 'how much should I sell the car for?' Cockney son in law says "you should get one and a half to sell it quickly" Hooray, wifey is delighted as her sells the car to the first person who paid in cash no less!

My mate Kym gets home after a hard days work as soon as he opens the door her says to him 'I have sold the car the money is on the mantle-piece' Kym goes to the mantle-piece checks the money his cheeks are getting inflamed his butt cheeks are tightening as he shouts "Who tf told you to sell it for that price ffs" her replies it was the son in law! Kym phones son in law "WTF price did you tell her indoors to sell that king car ffs" he says 'I told her one and a half' "There your are says wifey he told me to sell it for one and a half and that's what I sold it for one and a half £150.00 OMG FFS WTF!

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FRIDAY FALMOUTH at 12.30 pm//SATURDAY at MITCHELL 12.00 noon//SUNDAY at TRURO & St Columb at 1.30 pm//All subject to weatherPosted: 08/05/2019
FRIDAY FALMOUTH at 12.30 pm//SATURDAY at MITCHELL 12.00 noon//SUNDAY at TRURO & St Columb at 1.30 pm//All subject to weather
PLEASE NOTE; TRURO 'new time' at 12.00 noon from the 2nd of JUNE at 12.00 noon! If you have ANY FIVE tickets you can gain £5.00 off only at TRURO on SUNDAY June the 2nd .....The main reason we are changing the time is due to the traffic chaos around all roads surrounding the Cattle Market and Waitrose where we loose a lot of customers delayed by the heavy traffic, also this is good news for the rich dealers who can come straight from Hayle Car Boot then on to TRURO at 12 then on to St Columb Major for 1.30 where real BARGAINS EXIST!! Tell your friends! Could Car Boots Cornwall be running Car Boot Sales at "HEARTLANDS" soon?? Gossip or what? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx "WE HAVE MOVED" to CHAPEL FARM NEWQUAY Tuesdays & THURSDAYS at 1200 noon! Weather WARNING for light rain Friday also there is a FAIR at Falmouth this week but weekend seems fine so far! Wherever you sell keep an eye on your selling items 'no nicking please' our cameras do not lie! Geoff Says;
Wear a condom day!
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Posted on HOME PAGE 01/05/2019Posted: 02/05/2019
FRIDAY at 12.30 at FALMOUTH/SATURDAY at MITCHELL at 12/SUNDAY and MONDAY at TRURO both at 1.30 pm
Latest GREAT NEWS 1; St Columb Major STARTS SUNDAY at 1.30 pm/GREAT NEWS 2; We have MOVED to Chapel Farm (opposite HENDRA) Tuesdays and Thursdays at 12 noon/GREAT NEWS 3; we will stay at TRURO Car Boot Sundays at 1.30 pm then change the starting time to 12.00 noon at the end of May. St Columb will also run Car Boot Sales SUNDAYS at 1.30 pm.

Beware that someone may try to steal from your stall, they do it in town centres but to stoop as low to steal from Car Boot Sales is the total pits when sellers are trying to sell their unwanted items for some money for the family! please be aware?

Strictly NO DOGS in the selling area at MITCHELL however there are 3 fields where you can exercise yourselves and your dogs, how about that my lovers, walkies!! Knackering oh yes, but you are out in the fresh air and at field number three you can let your dogs off their leads for a while. If the missus reads this she will send you so she can quietly go round the boot sale and have the freedom to buy whatever she wants to buy without interference from you ffs! x Happy Bank Holiday, I have no idea why we have this weekend but every MONDAY should be a Bank Holiday.

Buy wisely then sell on eBay what goes around comes around? Why-ever not Geoff Says; x
Nigel and father rock-on Paul ugly buggers so they are fs.
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Mitchell; Saturday 27th of April Pussy Galore!Posted: 01/05/2019
Pussy Galore!
To start with this blog, I have to show great respect to the creators of this story that actually happened last Saturday at Mitchell, we were well into the sale lots of buyers carrying stuff they had bought at BARGAIN prices. Life was going on just about perfect when suddenly I get a message that 2 of my sellers mother and daughter who were selling in their own cars that the mothers pussy had been killed on the main road and that they must both leave the boot sale to go home and commiserate with the family, nice touch but they were both packing their stall into boxes and shoving it anywhere in both their cars at an alarming pace the slamming their car doors to leave the car boot. They drove slowly past myself Rock-on (Paul) and Nigel, we hung our heads in respect for the ladies dead 'pussy’ as the two ladies crying their bloody eyes out blurring their visions for driving with tears galore ffs!

I mean, it must be a dreadful experience when a woman’s pussy dies, sympathies all round and we discussed that maybe the cat was injured but still alive then that could be the reason for their haste! I said to Rock-on “Maybe they will have to give pussy ‘kiss of life’ have you ever given a pussy kiss of life ffs” to which he and Nigel went into hysterics with their filthy minds working overtime with mine, I mean hilarious or not but this is to all the women who have pussies of their own may I say with the greatest respect could I ask you “Would you go rushing home after your pussy had died, but the big question is my lovelies would your man be more upset than you that your very own pussy had died deceased, dead, no more gone, kaput! Think about it my men if her pussy has died what are you going to play with now then? Respects to all pussies and their owners forever;
If this story sounds a bit fishy, it is not, it is the truth ffs!
Geoff Says. x
Pussy Pants
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Posted 29/04/2019Posted: 30/04/2019
TUESDAY & THURSDAYS Car Boot sales at NEWQUAY (TR7 2JQ) see panel for details of all our Car Boots on the right!
We are hoping to move into our new location Chapel Farm on TUESDAY the 14th of May for our first Car Boot Sale at Chapel. We are at an angle opposite HENDRA HOLIDAY PARK the largest in Cornwall which gets packed with holiday-makers who love their Car Boots, they will spend well if you have what they want on your stall so sellers offer BARGAINS at sensible prices and buyers particularly my friends from Asia and all parts of Europe please be sensible when making an offer for if someone is asking £10.00 for an item it is bloody rude to offer them 'vun pound please' you cheeky sods and it's the men who some of them are not used to toilet and chain business so they take a pee behind the water tank, that's disgusting if we catch you believe me you will be put into the next Farm Auction after being castrated amongst all the fat cows ffs and I am not picking on but why are you all growing beards, did you know that because of germs it is better to kiss a dog than a man with a beard, much safer dears. Confucius he say; Never grow on your face what grows up your bum for free! Please note all the above my friends from all over the world welcome to our Boot Sales and spend some king money ffs! Love you'll. Geoff Says. x
Equality on thunder thighs!
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Next CAR BOOT review date is 07/07/2020
Please read Geoff Says.
@ TUESDAYS at Chapel Farm opposite HENDRA
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@ NEWQUAY Chapel Farm TR8 4NY
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@ MITCHELL (TR8 5FD) SATURDAYS at 12.00 noon
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@ St Columb Major (TR8 4JA)
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