Tuesday Newquay Circus Fields 04/08/2015

A bigger crowd of sellers than expected turned out to sell today and with so many thousands of holiday-makers we expected the sale to be well supported by eager bargain hunters so it is fair to say that our peak season event was attended by up to 3000 men women and their kids galore, added to that figure we must include about 300 dogs who seriously should have been elsewhere preferably in another county. High winds prevented many of our sellers from assembling their clothes rails but most stalls looked interesting and from the amount of items we saw being taken back to buyer’s cars it was obvious the majority of sellers were taking good money. The sale was well under way and our main team work is the supervision of car parking and the incoming and outgoing traffic so at about 1.15 pm we were all hands on traffic and crowd control.

I received a phone call from inside the sale from a regular “Geoff, there is going to be serious trouble at the top of the field where one of the sellers is lying on the ground drinking a bottle of whisky, he is obviously well pissed and being very offensive to people with really foul language to all the adults and in front of their children, if something isn’t done someone is going to smack him one” I got directions as to where the drunk was and as Oli and I approached the area of this man’s stall we could see the concern in nearby sellers faces who were obviously most offended by this man’s language and they looked to us to resolve the problem.

I immediately recognised the man who had sold at the previous Sunday’s Car Boot Sale at Penryn Rugby Club and I remembered him being very gobby so it was obvious he liked the sound of his own voice cos he was gobbing on about sweet FA so buyers were avoiding the area of his stall.
It seems he owed the stall holder a Cherry seller money and on the promise that it would be repaid he cadged a lift for him and his stuff to sell with the Cherry seller so he could sell items and repay the loan after selling.
I told the man I had had complaints about his language and he immediately went into a tirade of grossly offensive language in front of the assembled crowd telling me in no uncertain terms repeatedy to fuck right off, thereafter it was totally impossible to hold a sensible conversation with this idiot. I was receiving advice from all and sundry to ‘call the Police’ but remembering that all traffic was more or less in gridlock on all roads outside the Circus Fields it would be totally unreasonable to call the Police.
We do not like the idea of Police having to sort out our occasional problems but on this occasion I would have quite happily have borrowed a can of their pepper spray to empty into this man’s face whose disgraceful language in front of young kids and their mums and dads who were attending what is normally a trouble free event was unacceptable.

I tried to speak again to this man who was obviously very pissed and as he lay there on the ground with his empty whisky glass ‘mouthing it off’ to all and sundry I told him “You are BARRED from all of our Car Boot Sales so pack up your items and go” to further abuse advising that he would not go. Two or three sellers had had enough of this man’s offensive mouth and wanted to ‘sort him out’ in a physical way which in my opinion would not have helped unless with one SMACK he could have been hit hard enough to airlift him to land on Fistral Beach FFS!
The Cherry seller was obviously embarrassed that he had given this Pillock a lift and from what I saw of the items motor-mouth was trying to sell his items looked more than ready for the tip or had he in fact just got them from the tip?
I told the Cherry man ‘if you do not help him pack up his rubbish and your boxes of Cherries and are not out of this field within ten minutes then you and any other Cherry Sellers will be BARRED for the rest of the season, I will call back in ten minutes time’ more offensive language and grossly offensive gestures were directed at me but I had the support of the public so I hoped the matter would be quickly resolved within the allotted ten minutes. I think Oli was there to keep a check on me cos I was jumping and my adrenaline was up there somewhere, he has such a calming influence I nearly fell asleep the dear of him FFS!

Now then, I always know that if anyone is determined to bring our sales into disrepute our regulars who have supported Car Boots Cornwall over many years will come to the rescue. I received 3 calls within 5 minutes of walking away from the drunken sot telling me that he was fly tipping all of his unwanted selling items into the farmer’s hedge which is against the law in the UK and again I was advised ‘Call the Police’ instead of which I returned to the stall with instructions to take all the rubbish away and out of the hedge and I took this picture of what a real MORON looks like.
I don’t mind someone letting off steam once in a while but I do object that young children should have heard this drunken idiot’s foul and disgusting language.
Here is a list of the definitions of a MORON selected from GOOGLE that this dick-head fits them all;

= fool, idiot, dummy, berk, charlie, tosser, dope, jerk, ass, plank, prick, wally, prat, plonker, coot, geek, twit, bonehead, chump, dunce, imbecile, cretin, oaf, simpleton, airhead, dimwit, dipstick, dickhead, gonzo, schmuck, dork, nitwit, dolt, blockhead, divvy, pillock, halfwit, dweeb, putz, fathead, weenie, eejit, thicko, dumb-ass, gobshite, dunderhead, numpty, doofus, lamebrain, mental defective, fuckwit, thickhead, muttonhead, dickwit, nerd or nurd, numbskull or numskull, dorba or dorb, dork, besotted drunkard or wuuser!

I was going to call him a wanker but that would have been very disrespectful to all of those of us millions of men and women who quite enjoy that physical pastime FFS!

Go for it!

Geoff Says!

X