Over the August Bank Holiday weekend dramas!

Friday at Falmouth was a huge success and we were allowed onto the dead ball area for half the sellers and well appreciated by all concerned! Our Bex was missing (replaced by a small bollard) because as most regulars know she was due to have an operation on her legs which has been planned for several months. To be honest Bex is a bit of a coward and likes to cry a lot as the operation date gets closer so it didn’t help matter much when I told her the anaesthetic needle was 8 inches long and no specialist has been able to hit the right vein without several tries and that her arm may look like a pin cushion but ‘Bex be brave’

However as a nasty turn of fate and with her operation scheduled for Monday and her entire family were arriving to sit around her bed as she came round from the operation she received a call to say ‘Sorry but another operation will go ahead so yours has been moved and we will advise of the new date’!! Firstly she thought it was ME pissing about and winding her up but when reality set in our Bex cried and cried and then cried some more. Poor Jamie (Bex’s partner) was summoned to comfort poor Bex, me I could not stop laughing but we all love Bex such a lot and she can be a ‘right little Madam at times’ so my sympathy really goes for Jamie all 6 foot eight inches and at times it is fair to say she walks all over him! I must try that with Lou sometime!

Saturday morning at Truro Cattle Market although a quiet Car Boot Sale is well supported by good buyers particularly the main dealers who bought some great bargains but the MAIN event of the day was well anticipated by over 200 sellers and up to 3800 visits to the 1.00pm Car Boot Sale at MITCHELL off the slip road for Newquay. Reasonable weather but the entire sale went off without problems or incidents and we watched as countless bargains were carried back to the cars and there were so many happy kids faces as they conned their parents to ‘buy me this or I will scream the place down’ darling little BRATS!

As you know I cannot abide these squitty little shitty rat faced excuses for dogs that are paraded amongst the stalls on long lengthy string leads and I was delighted to see one of them wrap itself around one of our ‘nastier sellers’ tables legs and ‘Oh yes Bingo’ down came the fricking table to the yelps of the dog and screams of delights from our witnessing staff who are trained to look the other way when you hear a table CRASH with all its contents!

Once the sale is up and running my Lou departs to run the last Car Boot Sale of the day at the World famous Royal Cornwall Showground at Wadebridge where they also held an Antiques Fayre on the same day. The admission price to the Fayre is three quid a person so the sellers and buyers from that sale eagerly paid our bargain price of only 50p to come to our sale and I am reliable informed that all and sundry agreed that OUR CAR BOOT SALE was better value than the FAYRE and they spent very well with 3 reports of takings over two hundred quids and lots of other sellers takings over the one hundred pounds mark! Not bad going for a sale that starts at 3.00pm and like sex is all over within two hours!!

SUNDAY at MABE was its usual busy Car Boot and with decent weather everyone was happy including the kids who were treated once again by gullible parents, anything for a peaceful life. No real incident to report apart from our John who has worked on our Car Boot teams for 5 years he witnessed the unbelievable! A gypsy kid of about 5 dropped his trousers and as he squatted he took a dump on the field in front of John and shocked John says “You are not allowed to take a poo on the grass” to which the gypsy kid pulled up his trousers and picked up the poo and threw it into the family van!! Now then, if I had told his mum she would have beaten the shit out of the kid! Too late Mum, too late!!

BANK HOLIDAY Monday at Truro was just great, decent weather lots of BARGAINS lots of sellers and lots of buyers but there is always an incident or two which either makes or breaks the day. This Monday was no exception! I had a really nice lady come to complain that she heard two buyers at her stall have verbal’s to each other with one threatening the other that he would ‘put a gypsy curse on you’ which the lady took seriously enough for it to spoilt her afternoon. I convinced her not to worry about the incident and calmly told her to enjoy the rest of the car boot sale so she went back to her stall to sell.
Shortly after two very irate men came to me asking if I would sort out their argument because they had both seen the same bargains at the same time and they both made a grab for the items and one of them told me ‘He put a gypsy curse on me’! I allowed them to rant at each other like the nerds they were being then interrupted “Right, I have heard enough this is absolute HANDBAGS now if you go that way and you go that way” I directed the lads left and right “and if I hear any more of the absolute CRAP I will BAR you both, now sod off” and they accepted my wishes, end of incident!

But the most stupidity of all the weekend was I was sitting in the car with Rachel who is always in the calming influence mode, we were watching the sellers when I noticed a boy of about 7 walking on top of a long wheel based white van and my immediate thought was for the child’s safety my second thought was for our Public Liability Insurance and I did not want any stupid claims over what looked like irresponsible parenting. Immediately I left the car and approached the vehicle and told the mother “Take that child down otherwise there could be a serious accident” She refused saying “he is not coming down until his father comes back” and again I demanded that in the interest of the child he should get down to which the lady (mother) became offensive and rude to me also to neighbouring sellers. Ten minutes later and with most buyers taking my side the kid was eventually taken off the top of the van! What stupidity and what gross ignorance to jeopardise a young lad’s life by allowing him stand almost nine feet above the mother’s car boot table and if he had fallen off onto her table it would have been my FAULT!!

Apart from all that it was a great weekend and for the record over 14,000 people attended our events over this August Bank Holiday, we are the BEST in the West and you are all so lucky that I am so gifted to organise such incredible events, you lucky people! (That should raise a few hackles my lovers) XX