Our Alice is now in her third year with CBC she is still at School until August. As sellers know she collects the rents and generally helps with the supervision of some of our sales. She is a very happy person but she saw red when some idiot decided to ‘wheel spin’ his van making serious scars on the grass. She told the male driver “Please don’t do that you will damage the ground” to which he replied “I don’t ******* need to take lessons from you telling me how to drive” Alice said “I am not telling how to drive, I am telling you how NOT to drive”
More verbal abuse from the driver then he decides to pick on Tamii (not a very bright move) she is some hard! He carried on giving her the verbal’s so between Alice and Tamii more than 15 minutes later they had-had enough and told him to leave and BARRED him!

Well done! We have waited 3/4 weeks to get back to Mitchell because of the weather and ground conditions then you get some idiot who wants to rip up the turf doing sodding wheel-spins just for a laugh or showing off to Alice, I wouldn’t do that son, it takes a lot to impress Alice and digging up a farmers field with a heavy van is not one of them. She also knows how to deal with real men in her life, her three brothers for instance (Steady on Geoff)

For no reason at all last week Alice called me a ‘heartless bastard’ I think it might have had something to do with the lady whose car broke down right inside the gates just at 1.30 where there were masses of cars all wanting to get into the same gate Alice says ‘Shall I call the AA or RAC’ “No, if the woman had-had her car serviced that would not have happened and she wouldn’t be holding up all this traffic, let her call her own AA let’s get the crowds in FFS woman” ‘You are a heartless bastard’ said she but I cannot repeat the rest of her sentence of which I assume was foul newly invented school language, I did not understand but I believe it’s pretty similar to my FFS & GAFY cos I could not GAF or GAFF really!
At the end and after the AA had been the car owner thanked Alice so much for her help during ‘my hour of need’ and gave her a religious leaflet in a gesture of appreciation. TFOB!!
X

Any finally, this is true! My missus Lou was at a stall at Mitchell on Saturday and quite liked a copper pot (ideal size for under the bed) she asked ‘how much is this pot please’ the lady says £2.50 Lou pays the £2.50 and feels inside the pot just as she was about to walk away from the stall. Her pulls out enough Cannabis for at least half a dozen spliffs. She said to the lady “Is this where you used to keep your stash” and the woman totally embarrassed says ‘Yes, how do you know that?’ Lou then shows her the packet of smoke, she looks at her husband and says ‘What do you know about this?’ he grabs the weed from his wife and throws it is the back of the car, guilt was apparently written all over his face but their daughter who had as much guilt written all over her face was also helping on the stall and she said absolutely nowt! A cute little story but I said to Lou ‘Why TF did you hand it in you could have given it to me FFS and I would have given it to one of my elder customers to perk her up a bit. News on Marge she is in Spain somewhere (3rd holiday this year) She is the real reason I don’t swear on these blogs any more, she don’t like swearing and she has absolutely no idea what my abbreviations are all about FFS!! Xx

A request too far;
A lady customer told me that someone had bought an item from her stall and the word SUN was on a yellow background which fell off the items sold. For some reason I have been asked to carry the stupid looking label measuring 2” x half an inch FFS around with me just in case they read this tosh dearest, I do get the feeling that ‘I have been set up on this one’ by a lady who earns the title ‘Nutter of the day’ but also another person worthy of a sudden kiss me ansum! Anyway, if someone does ask for this piffling little label I shall want to take a picture of the item sold to see what sort of crap my lady friend has sold to you my lover!
XX