Dear Prime Minister,

The quickest way to upset the Scots is by you going to Scotland because they hate you and your bloody ‘effing Tories’ party. I reckon the NO votes will win by 53/47 and the next Deputy Prime Minister will be Nigel Forage and you will be the lost leader.
Stay away from Scotland Davy boy surely there is a war somewhere you can poke your nose into and spend billions of our tax payers money like we still are in Iraq?