News and history;

30th July 2021 FRIDAYS; It’s good news week for Falmouth Rugby Club CAR BOOT SALES that returns to recommence our sales after the COVID 18 months break from our sales after 32 years of running our sales at Falmouth this coming FRIDAY the 6th of August at 12.30 pm! Everyone loves Falmouth Car Boots and the people are nice (well some of them) I will be there in person (weather permitting) PLEASE NOTE; Parking is limited for buyers so why not park and walk or leave the car at home my lovers you know it would be good for you to walk from TRURO to Falmouth,  (brilliant smoke) that would kill off a few old farts so I wont be participating but they have all been ‘double jabbed’ and will live forever ffs, have you had your JABS yet my birds? Seriously all ages must GET THE JAB please, Steph and her man have had theirs for themselves and their three adorable children, now that make sense, don’t it though? Geoff. x  

TODAY TUESDAY 27th was CANCELLED at NEWQUAY due to rain and drizzles most areas. Sorry. Geoff. x                                                                 

 SATURDAY at MITCHELL was CANCELLED if we have ‘got it wrong’ blame the BBBC!! They did get it wrong, I have seen no rain all day. BBC forecasts ruin all outdoor activities with their percentages of forthcoming weather when they are so wrong time and again. I spoke with a farmer who told me on Thursday “there will be no rain on Saturday” I wish I had taken his opinion. Geoff TODAY Saturday we have cancelled MITCHELL due to heavy rain with warnings of possible floods.   I think the BBC have got it wrong again but we do not want a replay of chaos rain and cancellation of 2 weeks ago when sellers got drenched in an unexpected downpour sending themselves home in record times with soaking clothes shoes  y fronts knickers the lot and were they all well pissed off, you bet! The forecast for today was supposed to be overnight heavy rain, there was a 15 minute shower and at 7.00 am BBC say 86% chance of rain which is total bull shit there is not a drop of rain at all!! Sorry to cancel, it’s back to bed time. Result!!  XX 

            TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS at NEWQUAY (opposite HENDRA HOLIDAY PARK at 12.00 noontime. A nice location poo bags welcome with accompanying dogs and well trained owners, thousands of bargains, nice sellers and buyers in the heart of West Cornwall. Welcome to our guests from up country may your stay be pleasant may your dosh been flowing cos we has had a terrible year and a half but now we are safe because Cornwall has highest figures for ALL of us to HAVE THE JABS my lovers, have you? Save yourself and your friends lives. Bless Up man!   

We are sorry to have cancelled SUNDAY at TRURO and St Columb Major due to the piddling rain so it is now time to talk to the family and say sorry if you have been in the wrong to your missus who always is in the right according to herself, say sorry to the kids for shouting at them then piss off to the pub with your mates but on the way pop in and get a nice takeaway to be delivered to the missus and the kids, what a nice thing to do but get all of the really strong WTF curry sauces with each meal so they will remember the flowing day with doses of the poo-runs me ansum, then off to the pub with your mates to get pissed out of your minds and a spliff at midnight ffs, it’s good to daydream innit? Geoff.  X   By the way “HAVE YOU HAD YOUR JABS YET”  is in the interest of the sensible Cornish people who may or could have to self-isolate due to an infection from the influx of tourists. To those who don’t approve of my message I am targeting the people here in Cornwall in the hope they will pass the message on to other sensible people! Do you get the point it’s called “J A B” it saves lives don’t you know and by the way the complainants by email are none other than yer bleedn suvverners mate bragging about owning ‘second homes’ here in CORNWALL ffs! And, and people who live here can get their jabs at Royal Cornwall Showground no less! Geoff Says!!

 PLEASE NOTE; It is against the law for persons to tout our customers to sell inferior FAGS-CIGARETTES!! Don’t do it TRADING STANDARDS have the power to take all of your stock and your vehicle and anyway your fags are the worst you can buy and they make you barf up a lot and you cough up your guts because the fags you are selling are full of shite man made by idiots for idiots and, and you could get cancer ffs. Seriously, if any person tries to sell my customers cheap fags that NO TAX has been paid on them watch out man cos it’s off with your balls time, at least!     Just to mention there was a wonderful smell of weed wafting through the air at TRURO on Sunday afternoon reported to me by an elderly lady with a happy smile on her face, how sweet. x   Geoff