STOP this fking WAR which seriously has got fcuk all to do with us ffs!
WAKE UP Politicians ffs!
GET PUTIN ‘now and out’ ffs! Hello, I am Geoff Says, I started writing this in August so I am not sorry if the delay has upset you, I accept full responsibility for any offence I have caused to you my dear reader, I deem it as a great honour, Enjoy!!
Peace and love to you in particular.
Geoff. X
TALK PEACE NOW in the interest of the whole world, please, please please for the millions upon millions of my fellow human beens, this is not what we were born for ffs we deserve peace in our own world, do it NOW ffs!!
So its, Good bye Boris (or is it) it is so good that there has been such an election to replace him with Miss- dis-Trust a die-hard Tory (in other words, another Thatch but worse ffs) (Guess what She gone!) but what will he the ex-pm be famous for apart from ignoring the public and treating the job like an eccentric prig. He could have been a real hero to have had the balls to demand to see another prig ‘PUTIN’ to end this frigging war of which our ‘Mr & Mrs Joe Public’ the entire BRITISH PEOPLE and the rest of our freeking world are being held at ransom by this Turd Putin ffs, and and and ffs we are all paying the price and will do for months maybe years to come bringing misery to homes where there were once happiness, but now it’s all ‘doom and gloom’ and it aint your faults my lovers!!
I mean the President of Ukraine seems a decent enough bloke but he must know by now that Putin will eventually win because of his nuclear threats and the vastness of his army and his crap ability to accept and keep on forcefully recruiting thousands of young untrained Russian troups who will die into the history of his rotten campaign to prove his fact that he has got us all by the balls, but no-one, furking no-one has the bigger balls to take the bastard out ffs. Seriously, and secretly, I reckon there must be a price on his head ffs there must be a plan in countries whose peoples have suffered enough and will suffer more unless, unless what? Unless someone with BIG BALLS takes him for a walk to the end of the misery he has caused on this planet, FFFFFSake!!!

So after a couple more smokes this is my plan!! Stoned lovers!!
Unless Puke-up uses the ‘poisenous chemicals’ that he has used on so many Russians who were actually really nice people, but Mr Putin alias Bum-Hole-Schmells put them to death with his nerve chemical gas so he earns the title as a mashed up turd of the first degree, worse than Ena Sharples and Hilter ffs! And now, the very latest is that Puke-in has had a crawl-up-arse meeting with that Che bloke of CHINA asking him to get involved with the Ukraine War ffs, Chairman Che, he say “nonotforme,ffs!” Say Che, wonderful reply from Che-Che now then my lover ChooChoo just get your ‘human rights’ sorted out in your beautiful country and then we can start towards peace throughout the World when we could all start to begin our lives again and freedom for all your people as well, please ffs, so why not start today to release all the people who have been in your prisons without reason, your policies ‘just lock them up’ is a total load of bollocks, with the greatest respect sir or Mr Che please, or I could and I should and I will put a curse on your personal limpy-dick and swelling bolax problem and COVID sir?!!
Tell you what Presidantity Che, why not invite Tosser PUTIN and yourself with me to my mancave here in the depths of Cornwall for a few drinks and a couple of Carribean (home grown) real weed spliffs mate, then a couple more then we can all three of us can go out in my man Nigel’s boat, take stoner Puking-up take him out into the depth of the deepness man amid the raging seas (stoned and out of it man’ yer know wot I’m saying ffs) way out over there to the bottom of the sea of seas mates into the shark ridden and infested waters mates, I mean really fking right into the depth man of the ocean cos it could now be the total end of bollocks chops Putin forever ffs cos he is also so stoned and out of it to fcuk man ffs! So now Mr Chee it’s time for some action just you and me (boat driver Nigel will elp for a few quids extra (know what I mean sport) so now then-now then, we two men and Nige can pick up ‘dead dog puke puke-in’ and put him “PUT-IN” into the sea then we can both fcuk off cos we don’t want they there sharks to effing reject the bastard and av to take him back do we Mr Chee? So, now then we can fcuk off back home, war over with my new friend, ‘he’s the one with the slitty almond eyes’ ffs but he’s really good looking man from a couple of miles away! Did you like my play on words PUTIN -PUT-IN ffs?

Geoff Says rant; I Mean this war, Puke-ins war, I mean it’s affecting all of my beloved fellow Cornwalls human beans cos;
The furking fuel have gone up, all foods av really gone up, clothing av gone up, school uniforms av gone up ffs, rates av gone up, mortgages av gone up, sex toys av gone up (according to our Marge) Batteries fer yer vibes av gone up, yer pigging blood preasures for defo av gone up, yer fricking electricity and Gas av gone up so how tf are we all going to pay ffs, well my lovers if you cannot pay then DON’T figging pay ffs, you can Quote; Geoff Says (who talks a load of bowl-ax anyway) I mean, they are hardly going to send us all into mixed prisons are they? Not mixed? Oh no (wot a shame) so my fellows, my kith and kin so to speak, if we cannot pay their bs demanding bills they can all GAFTs dears? so don’t let it all upset you my lovers, (I wish some of you were my lovers, part time vacancy arises at times ffs) (dirty old sod stoned and out of it) but listen, Mostly it’s important, that you do not neglect your own health nor the health of your family because your health is your wealth my birds therefore first and foremost you have got to eat properly, cut out the crisps, lovely that they are, but they are bliddy full of too much salt to weigh the packets heavier my lovers, so instead of eating a salt mine over a pigging year (that’s where the weight is put on my mates) so, you gotta eat lots of fruit and vegetables and puke pasta salads and stuffs ffs, you must take lots of excercise empty your bowels daily, and most importantly try having a good old row with the neighbours followed by a daily shag the ‘in-out business’ (sex darlings, sex) I mean open all the windows and scream and scream “fcuk me fcuk me harder harder just to annoy the neighbours and when it’s ‘coming’ to the climatic point you can wake up and it’s all been a frigging dream ffs!! But, wtf is going on there then at least once a day, I mean that’s fer free aint it, but hershe (the ones we all love) emphatically says “Ooh, (wimpish voice) I cannot be bothered with all that freeking stuffing, so NO that’s not for me ffs” (end of wimpish voice now masculine) Wtf are you on about darling he says under his breath! Sod it, I’ll have to go it alone again, ffs!!